Tuesday, December 30, 2008
So, what is the big fuss about relationships and issues related to it? Is it love that holds two people together and if so, then have we been able to find out what this means. Well, contemporary glorified love is more attuned with buying gifts, having a social recognition, thinking that you care about each other, sometimes even competing as to who is the superior one in the relationship!! It’s more like being in love with the idea of love rather than love itself. I am suddenly asking all these questions to myself because a very dear person of mine, she is like a friend and a mentor to me, is going through a bad divorce and this came as a real shock to me. I started thinking and had certain thoughts which I’d like to share with you all. Love in its purest and truest form refers to ‘self-love’ and by that I don’t mean a selfish love but knowledge of one’s own self. The big question here is what do I want? What makes me happy and how can I change myself in order to bring about the change that I want in people and things around me? Very often we hear the phrase, “I want to change him or her” or sometimes “My way of thinking is so right”. What we forget is that it is right for me perhaps but might not be so for someone else. Now, loving and knowing oneself is to be in the presence of the knowledge that every individual’s basic nature is that of love, peace, sweetness and harmony. We all have it in us and that our only responsibility here, on this Earth is to spread them like a fragrant flower. Now in doing so, I would be happy and content because then I would be doing exactly what nature intended for me to do. And people around will automatically be attracted to do the same....this applies to any sort of relationship as well. Like Emily Dickinson says:
“If I can stop one heart from breaking,
I shall not live in vain;
If I can ease one life the aching,
Or cool one pain,
Or help one lonely person
Into happiness again
I shall not live in vain.”
Thus if I have respect for myself , love for myself, devoid of that constant self criticism, useless comparison and free from the blame game, then I guess that is what I would call a relationship and that too......a successful one :)
Friday, October 17, 2008
Recently I had an idea and put that to use for two months. The post implementation feeling, which is pretty amazing, I wanted to share it with all you friends out here. I had thought of two things: Firstly- I would try and help out someone in need (and by that I don’t mean in need of a mobile phone or a watch!), a real need , once every week i.e. a minimum of one help every week. Secondly-I decided that I would put away some money (don’t ask me how much, cause it’s very minimal, but hey! That’s the best I can do at this age and with my means:)). And at the end of every month I would spend it on someone randomly, someone I don’t know, who doesn’t expect anything from me, someone who needs it. A need far better justified than the need for a bigger television (37”, 41” ...60”, 65”, plasma, HD???), better car (is Ferrari the limit???), the latest video game (is it Prince of Persia, GTA IV or Madden2009???) Then I thought “let’s corporatize my ideas a lil bit, let’s give them a glam quotient.” After all today, a sense of importance is so much synonymous with designation, money, power, consumerism and so on. So I decided to call my first idea as “Project smiley week” and the second one as “Project random love” Thus: PROJECT: Smiley Week TARGET: 1 person every week INCENTIVE: unknown as of now, we’ll see my friends :) and the second one as PROJECT: Random Love TARGET: a person every month INCENTIVE: Don’t know at this point! So, I set out achieving my targets. I won’t go into the details of my work, but can surely tell you the results and the incentives achieved!! Project smiley week- successful, target achieved! And incentive, a happy lil face who waves at me every day, a mother who is not afraid and not ready to abort a girl child and most importantly a happy me! Project random love- successful, target achieved! And incentive, what can I say? I feel like a citizen of the whole world now, I see myself everywhere. Well, I know the incentive doesn’t match up to a six figured salary or a British / American citizenship but it has a feeling of eternity about itself. The pursuit of happiness ends here, peace is here to stay! I realised that in today’s independent India where politicians do not leave much scope for improvement , it’s time we stopped complaining and started doing something , even a small step , individually .And it’ll add up to big changes. Like I have said in my blog: “Start by doing what is possible and Very soon you will be doing the impossible.” Now, you might ask me how the hell I knew so much about games and televisions and many such material things! Well, that’s the power of consumerism. But even after knowing them all I am not in dire need of possessing them, I have discovered the false notion of importance attached to them all. Now, that my friend, is the power of the soul:)
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
The other day I was at a social gathering where I met some new people or shall I say some new kind of people which introduced me to a soul searching question. Now, I must mention at this point that prior to this I have been working on self -empowerment, practicing meditation, listening to some much realised souls, in the process developing self confidence, esteem, understanding my true potential. But alas! All this time I was just thinking that I achieved the above mentioned transformation, when the truth is I need to work much more, much much more on myself than I thought to get to my inner peace!! I guess it was God’s way of telling me that I needed more practice to overcome the embarrassing act of such pretentious people. We were introduced to a person who is a writer but unfortunately (for him!) we didn’t know of him. And then started the whole charade on his part to make us realise his worth and worldly achievements. He cited examples of famous people (read celebrity) he knew, how rich he was etc etc. And all this left me at quite a loss of words, thoughts and reactions too I guess. So much of trumpeting did hit me hard and I realised I couldn’t say a single thing about myself. He was successful enough to make me blame myself for not being skilful enough to brag about myself in a sugar coated way. And then it suddenly hit me how an unrealised, uneducated soul can still cause a turmoil in me which only proves that I have a lot of work to do on myself to rise above these false, petty notions of self importance and popularity. At the end of my self analysis it all made me laugh at the fact that people around the world give so much importance to external factors, about trying to prove themselves and the emphasis is on looking and seeking outside rather than turning inside. It reminded me of:
“Give yourself a hug
When people put on airs
To make you feel a bug.....
And keep on singing,
‘Only one in a million like me
Only one in a million-billion-trillion-zillion
Saturday, May 10, 2008
I have been feeling for quite some time now that the existence of a very important word can be given the status of an endangered species nowadays. Its very conceptualisation has become very difficult. It’s the “T” word, yes that much adored, loved and hoped for TRUST . So the next question that arises is that “is trust important?” Well I would say it is as important as breathing, as indispensable as our conscience from us. People find it difficult to leave their homes for a few days to go on a holiday, friends fear that their information might not be safe with the other, a husband suspects his wife of cheating him, the wife’s scared that he might run away someday, two people in love contemplating from time to time whether they would make it to the altar. When I think of trust the perfect picture that conjures up in front of my eyes is that of a new born baby with a total surrender to its mother, a smile on its face that says “I am accepted, I am loved, I am cared for and I can trust.” Can we not expect such honesty, such faith, such confidence and trust in the natural process of progression that we call growth? Can grownups not be trustworthy to each other? I am sure they can J . We just need to keep the faith intact and am sure trust will follow. Let’s not give it a status of antiquity that can be auctioned. Let’s say to each other “ I trust you ”.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Recently I had been on a trip to Scotland where one day on a tour of the Highlands I came upon a chance encounter with a diverse array of people from different parts of the world. There were two friends from the US, a family from Finland, a few students from France, two German ladies and a man from Australia. The very firmly rooted Indian soul that I have made me wonder: is this what we call unity in diversity? As the day progressed and so did the tour we all got talking to each other, sharing our stories and thoughts and beliefs and would you believe what I found out? At the very core of all these Homo sapiens there was something very common, very similar. It was as if I had ventured into an unknown territory with a known ‘something’ that was staring right into my eyes. And then suddenly there it was in a flash! My known friend, ‘HUMANITY’. Sounds familiar eh? So I thought, is this what is called a spiritual unity of life? It was like a spiritual déjà vu :). It was amazing to find that Finnish Pam shared a similar fear with French Amelia and that American Frankie shared a common belief with Indian Shamayita :). Like it is said:
“Each soul is potentially divine. The goal is to manifest this divinity within by controlling nature, external and internal”
I thought, what if I looked at the much talked about globalisation not from a purely economical or statistical aspect but from a unique aspect of humanisation. As Robert Browning said:
“Love, hope, fear, faith- these make humanity:
These are its sign and note and character.”
And this humanity is what distinguishes a human being from a Homo sapien. This basic oneness among every single soul on this earth is indeed intriguing, even more so when you actually experience it. It was nice to know or rather reaffirm that basically we are all good, that we have the ability to love, the courage to dream and the faith to believe in the existence of this goodness.
Scotland of course was beauty personified. I plan to write about that as well. So, till next time all you beautiful people out there....peace out! :)
For the past few days I have been seeing people writing a lot about sex, love and the relationship or the absence of it between the two. I found that they were quite a popular read which made me think.....And think I did. We are really curious about this three letter word aren’t we?? Whether it’s in print or someone mentions sex, we are all ears about it!! So I thought what’s the big deal! Lady sex surely has an aura of mystery, charm and universality about her. Some would define it as a biological need, others might say it is a necessity but I would rather think of it as a basic instinct. The terms like “good or bad”, “right or wrong” doesn’t really apply here. An act of pleasure might just bring out the essence of it. And what is this pleasure? Quoting Gibran I would say:
“Pleasure is a freedom song,
But it is not freedom .
It is the blossoming of your desires,
But it is not their fruit.”
And this freedom, in its truest sense prevails in the all encompassing, ever absorbing, overwhelming power of LOVE. As is said:
“Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love.”
I personally believe that to love and be loved is the greatest feeling that one can experience. It’s not just about loving your spouse or partner, it’s about love that one human being should share with another ,love that nature bestows on us and it’s powerful affection makes us fall in love with nature again and again. It’s vast, it’s ever-present and empowering, it’s beyond possession, and it’s about being one with yourself.
Both sex and love are an enigma in themselves. Let the mysticism continue......
Monday, March 24, 2008
As the days go by,
The youth surrenders
To the wiser self........
Age old wisdom calls it gold,
The world calls it old.
Surrender we must,
Surrender we will....
With a grace so subtle,
But a heart full of strong will.
Fear not the age my friend
Fear not the age,
As long as thoughts are young
And friendship grows strong,
A bunch of old friends will rejoice,
That their friendship is still young.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Happiness they say
Is a state of the mind,
Make way for it
Stop and unwind.
In nature’s simple abode,
Be one with nature or God
As you perceive Him to be.
Feel the air of freedom in your face
Living life to the fullest,
With happiness and grace.
Live the present moment
Like nothing else matters,
Holy blessings to bring you peace
The Divine hand scatters.
Cast away that shadow of fear
Consider it buried in the past,
All your sorrow and tear.
Stop, pause and take a while,
See around and give that smile.
Release yourself from the daily grind
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Do we all have to be children in order to understand them??? I guess not. A pure mind, a compassionate heart, a will to understand and most importantly expecting nothing of our expectations mostly framed by a superficial social standard, from them which can drive anyone crazy! They will never be doing things as important as playing in the sun, drawing in the sand, running around with friends, not bothered about things as survival and existence, far from the maddening world of the adults, but only in childhood. Every human being is unique and a child is born with this unique identity. The adult’s role in such a case is only to help the child discover this uniqueness in him, to help him look inwards and explore rather than burden him with the superficiality of the exterior.
Let all children realize their true potential and may everyone emerge as a citizen of healthy mind and body, a soul pure enough to acknowledge purity, a character strong enough to withstand all odds, a mind broad enough to appreciate the goodness in all and a simplicity retained from childhood to make him realize it’s a wonderful life worth living.